Summary of The Story
The article presents a satirical narrative about modern dating, contrasting two male figures and a woman’s interactions with both. It follows a gentleman, who treats a woman with respect and attentiveness throughout their dates, including thoughtful gestures like bringing flowers, speaking French at a restaurant, and planning romantic activities. Despite his efforts, the woman seems disinterested in him, giving excuses and not reciprocating his affection. Simultaneously, she pursues a casual, lust-driven relationship with an “Alpha wolf,” a man who treats her indifferently and only engages with her for physical intimacy.
The story highlights the gentleman’s unreciprocated devotion, as he continuously tries to win her heart while she pursues more superficial, non-committal relationships. It critiques the woman’s conflicting actions—lamenting the lack of good men but disregarding the genuine interest of the gentleman—and portrays the complexities of modern dating and human behavior through exaggeration and irony.
The Story
A gentleman will arrive at a ladies dwelling early Friday evening and present her with a selection of beautiful, expensive and exotic flowers. He will compliment her beauty as he escorts her to his moderately priced but environmentally friendly automobile and opens
the door for her. They will arrive at the expensive French restaurant where he will pull out the chair for his exquisite date. He will tenderly ask her what she likes to eat, when the waiter arrives he will order (in French) exactly what she likes and nothing she doesn’t. The date will go very well, they have so many things in common.
He thinks she could be the one he has been waiting for his whole life. He starts to imagine
their life together. It’s just going so well and she’s so perfect he doesn’t want to rush
things. Which is good because she said she doesn’t want to rush things either.
He drops her off early (she has to wake up early) and he kisses her on the cheek and tells her what a great time he had. He eagerly makes plans for their next date and she accepts. He drives home. He hops online and updates his social internet account with a new status about the evening and what a great time he had. He then goes to bed, still thinking about the future with this girl, masturbates and falls asleep with a smile.
When the girl is dropped off, she goes inside to her apartment and logs on to social internet account. She then opens her apple cellular telephone and sends a message to an Alpha wolf she has been casually seeing for the past few weeks, asking what he is doing. He does not respond.
After one hour she decides to go to bed. She is awoken two hours later when she receives a new message from the Alpha wolf which simply says “come over dont wear anything but a coat”. She responds that she is sleeping and can she see him tomorrow. He does not respond. 10 minutes later she text messages him and says she is on her way. She arrives at his apartment, he pulls off her coat, tells her to get on her knees and she eagerly
complies, saying I wilst do that for thee.
The next morning at work she is very tired but has no regrets. The next Wednesday cannot come soon enough for the gentlemen, for that is when he will go on date #2 with his potential new girlfriend. He arrives 4 minutes early to their arranged time, she is still getting ready but that is ok, he is an understanding person. When she is finally ready 27 minutes later he presents her with a gift, just a small necklace that made him think of her. Again, he escorts her to his automobile and drives her to the ice-skating rink inside the mall.
They have a fantastic time ice-skating and then they go to the food court for pizza, she tries to pay for half but he declines for a gentleman always pays for a lady. And he knows how to treat a lady. They eat for a while. She casually mentions how early she has to be at work the next day. Concerned about the time, he asks her if she needs to go home. She says yes.
Without hesitation he drives her home. When they arrive at her apartment he works up the courage to ask if he can come in for some hot chocolate. She replies that she really wants to take it slow this time, and besides, she has work the next day. He understands and kisses her on the cheek.
That Friday, the gentlemen calls her and asks if she would like to attend a movie that evening. She replies that she has already made plans with her best girlfriends. He asks
her what she is doing tomorrow, she says she has plan but that maybe she can break them. She will let him know tomorrow. He says ok and tells her to have a great night. She says you too.
She goes to the local discotheque with her best girlfriends and they dance. Many guys try to dance with her and she brushes them off, other guys she dances with. One guy in particular she thought was attractive at first but turned out to be really rude. She asked him
to buy her a drink, he said sure, went to the bar and returned with two drinks: a whiskey and coke for himself and a glass of tap-water for her. He even laughed at her. She bids him adieu.
During the evening the gentleman text messages her and asks if she is having a good time. She ignores the messages. Instead, she has been unable to stop watching her new gentleman caller, the one who returned with a water for her. He has been talking and smiling with a lot of other girls and guys. He hasn’t paid very much attention to her except for the occasional glances in which she breaks eye-contact before he does.
Nearer the end of the evening, when the discotheque is about to close, he casually strolls up to her and says lets go. Surprised, she says where. He says my home. She acts flabbergasted and waits for him to explain. He says nothing. After 15 seconds she says ok, I’d like to. They arrive at his apartment home and have sex without a condom.
Her gentlemen caller cannot sleep for he is worried about her as she has not returned any of his three text messages. He calls her the next morning to make sure she is ok, she mentioned how her phone died the night before and that she didn’t receive any of his messages. He asks her to accompany him for the evening and she says she can’t but if something changes she will let him know. He says ok, have fun.
That evening the lady returns to the discotheque scene with her best girlfriends, where she runs into the Alpha wolf from the previous Friday evening. He is with another young lady and ignores her. She chatters with her best girlfriends about what ungentlemanly like behavior the Alpha wolf displays.
When she returns home for the evening she logs into her social internet account and leaves a comment lamenting the fact that there are no good men left and what a shame it is. The gentleman, fearing she is speaking of him, instantly responds and says that he is there for her if she would like to talk. She says thank you, you are so sweet and then she goes to sleep. The gentlemen understands that this is merely a test for her love and affection and devises a very romantic plan to win her heart forever.
The next afternoon the gentleman, understanding how emotionally vulnerable she is, asks if she’d like to go shopping to make her feel better. She says yes, that is so sweet. They go to the mall and he patiently waits while she tries on her stylish new clothes and when it
is time to pay he hands the cashier his visa credit card. Surely the lady will see that he can provide for her and will do anything to win her heart.
He drives her back to her apartment home and this time she invites him in. They sit on the sofa and she again tries on some of her new clothes. He comments how pretty she looks, to which she responds with a smile. She sits down on the sofa and she kisses him.
He kisses back, eagerly. After a minute she pushes him away and says she doesn’t want to go to fast or get too involved, don’t you see her heart has been broken before. He says yes, I understand. I would never want to rush you. Whenever you are ready let me know and I will be here for you.
The gentleman leaves her apartment, understanding she she needs some space and some time to sort out her feelings. The lady, using the camera on her apple cellular telephone, takes a picture of herself in the bathroom mirror with her breasts exposed and messages the picture to the Alpha wolf who ignored her the previous evening. She captions the photograph with the words this is what you could have had.
The Alpha wolf does not respond. The lady again logs into her social internet account and reports to her friend network that guys are such pigs and only want one thing and there are no good guys left and that at least she is following her heart.